Quarter Life Crisis
My job is god awful. Since I only have to work three or four hundred hours a week, I have no social life. I pay almost a grand a month for a shit-tastic 250 square foot basement apartment. One of my upstairs roommate has some kind of disability that prevents him from knocking before he walks down the basement stairs despite having walked in on me mid-coitus four times. Worse than that, my ex-boyfriend lingers around the house because he's formed a bromance with another roommate that rivals any amount of affection he ever showed for me. About the only remotely pleasant part of my day is my adorable bunny, who at this moment is chewing on my keyboard and occassionally stepping on the keys so it looks like I'm swearing in a Bugs Bunny cartoon.
In times such as these, the plan is clear. I've taken solace in the three men who have yet to disappoint me: Jose Cuervo, Ben & Jerry. That probably has nothing to do with the ten pounds I've gained. Well, that the 30 odd hours I spend watching bridal shows on WE every week.
I'm a spinster. A crazy cat lady so crazy that she doesn't realize her cat is actually a rabbit.
I refuse to feel sorry for myself. In the wake of the boyfriend debacle, I did what I always do: I went straight out to find someone else. I proceeded to have more sex in a three hour period with a hot stranger than I'd had in the past three months with my live-in boyfriend. I nursed my hangover and hickeys the next day, and I planned my escape. Time spent wishing is time wasted.
In the months since then I've planned and executed a full scale life overhaul. I cut, dyed and straightened my hair. I bought all new clothes. I turned down two incredible job offers in DC in favor of a quiet desk job. In Wisconsin.
Yes, Wisconsin.
Two weeks from today I'll be heading the way of Horatio Alger, and exploring the frontiers of beer, cheese and farm boys. My new downtown Madison apartment is a shock fifty percent less than my digs here and has a view of the lake. As I sell all my stuff and pack the few things I'm keeping, I've reminiscing more than could possibly be healthy. I"d like to promise that I'll share the stories that keep bubbling up but it seems unlikely that I'll have much time to do so in the next fourteen days. But soon. Until then,leave some comments and some suggestions for new posts. And don't let John Mayer songs convince you to make major life changes.
In times such as these, the plan is clear. I've taken solace in the three men who have yet to disappoint me: Jose Cuervo, Ben & Jerry. That probably has nothing to do with the ten pounds I've gained. Well, that the 30 odd hours I spend watching bridal shows on WE every week.
I'm a spinster. A crazy cat lady so crazy that she doesn't realize her cat is actually a rabbit.
I refuse to feel sorry for myself. In the wake of the boyfriend debacle, I did what I always do: I went straight out to find someone else. I proceeded to have more sex in a three hour period with a hot stranger than I'd had in the past three months with my live-in boyfriend. I nursed my hangover and hickeys the next day, and I planned my escape. Time spent wishing is time wasted.
In the months since then I've planned and executed a full scale life overhaul. I cut, dyed and straightened my hair. I bought all new clothes. I turned down two incredible job offers in DC in favor of a quiet desk job. In Wisconsin.
Yes, Wisconsin.
Two weeks from today I'll be heading the way of Horatio Alger, and exploring the frontiers of beer, cheese and farm boys. My new downtown Madison apartment is a shock fifty percent less than my digs here and has a view of the lake. As I sell all my stuff and pack the few things I'm keeping, I've reminiscing more than could possibly be healthy. I"d like to promise that I'll share the stories that keep bubbling up but it seems unlikely that I'll have much time to do so in the next fourteen days. But soon. Until then,leave some comments and some suggestions for new posts. And don't let John Mayer songs convince you to make major life changes.
posted by The Husskateer at 8:47 PM
3 comments
