Post-Birthday Post
Recommendations for my future birthdays:
1. Don't devour two huge poppyseed muffins while laying on the couch. Also, don't lie and say it was two muffins, when you really know that it was three.
2. Wear comfortable shoes.
3. Forget the carbs and calories and stick to beer. It's your birthday and calories don't count on your birthday. Honestly, does it matter if you have 10 beers when you ate those huge muffins?!?
4. Remember where the bar you intend to go to is located.
5. Don't buy Tastykakes at 3:30 am.
6. Avoid getting into a taxi with a strange man named Ed. Boys who go out on a Saturday night in button down shirts are either Republicans or asshats. Sometimes both.
7. Stay away from flowerbeds with short fences around them. When drunk, they seem like great things to fall into.
8. Leave your phone at home. You'll only call/text people you shouldn't.
9. Do not, under any circumstances, decide to write a post on your silly blog when you can barely stand up.
All around, my birthday was fairly good. I ate to much, drank too much, and fell into a flowerbed. I did not find Boy Blue, or any boy that I wanted to take home, but I feel alright about that. I lost my best friend somewhere during the night, and I feel alright about that too. I had a good time and I did what I felt like, and after all, that's what birthdays are about. Here's to 24.
1. Don't devour two huge poppyseed muffins while laying on the couch. Also, don't lie and say it was two muffins, when you really know that it was three.
2. Wear comfortable shoes.
3. Forget the carbs and calories and stick to beer. It's your birthday and calories don't count on your birthday. Honestly, does it matter if you have 10 beers when you ate those huge muffins?!?
4. Remember where the bar you intend to go to is located.
5. Don't buy Tastykakes at 3:30 am.
6. Avoid getting into a taxi with a strange man named Ed. Boys who go out on a Saturday night in button down shirts are either Republicans or asshats. Sometimes both.
7. Stay away from flowerbeds with short fences around them. When drunk, they seem like great things to fall into.
8. Leave your phone at home. You'll only call/text people you shouldn't.
9. Do not, under any circumstances, decide to write a post on your silly blog when you can barely stand up.
All around, my birthday was fairly good. I ate to much, drank too much, and fell into a flowerbed. I did not find Boy Blue, or any boy that I wanted to take home, but I feel alright about that. I lost my best friend somewhere during the night, and I feel alright about that too. I had a good time and I did what I felt like, and after all, that's what birthdays are about. Here's to 24.
posted by The Husskateer at 10:01 AM
1 Comments:
Postscript - for your 30th don't hire a party-bus that can sit 50 and pay over $500 unless you actually have friends who give a shit about your dignity.
Spending that much money, then fielding calls an hour before the bus is due to leave stating reasons why they 'just can't make it' (those who were polite enough to call), then sitting on a bus that has blaring music and flashing lights going 'whooo - um-hoo.' with the 15 people who did actually turn up is NOT a good way to start your 30s.
However , the loss of diginty can only be confirmed by your relatively new boyfrined finding you slumped in the shower, still drunk and bawling, with red hair dye and mascara running down your face at 7am the following day.
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